Those darn, intolerant Gays.

Alright, let's get real for a minute.

First, for some back story, and just because it's beautiful and everyone should see it, go here and watch this:

And if you want to see pictures of some of the couples, as well as pictures of stars crying and taking pictures on their cell phones then click here. 

After these 33 couples were married at the Grammy's, Facebook - as it is prone to do - exploded with people either talking excitedly about it, talking about how the world is going to hell, or taking the time to write a Facebook status about how they don't care…just incase, you know, not writing about it in one way or another might have confused people into thinking that they did, in fact, care. 

One such status said something to the like of, "So all of Hollywood's homosexuals got married at the Grammy's tonight? I'll just leave that alone." The irony. However, in my opinion, if you're going to express thinly veiled disdain for something, you should at least get your facts right. So I commented on the status to let him know that the 33 couples were in fact not Hollywood stars but regular people and that the couples weren't just gay - they were gay, straight, interracial and a variety of otherwise demographically spread people in love. The person admitted that they hadn't even watched the Grammy's or seen a clip, but rather that someone they knew had just liked a news story about it and that's what he had ascertained from the title. And then we left it there. Because I make it a point not to start debates on other people's Facebook pages because I know first hand how frustrating it can be when people do that.

BUT WAIT. IT DOESN'T END THERE. 

30 - 45 minutes later after the conversation was finished, another of this gentleman's Facebook friends felt the need to jump in and leave this lovely tidbit: 

The original poster then agreed with him. 

Well at first I laughed and ignored them, because is there even really a point in arguing with things that are so intrinsically illogical? But even as I told myself this, the comments made me more and more infuriated because A) holy random batman, you wanna throw a little bit more irrelevance into the conversation topic? B) it was a baseless comment the likes of which are usually only seen on Fox News, and C) because I wouldn't say anything back because I have seen this person's idiotic comments before and knew that if I did say anything it would blow up, and again, I won't start debates on other people's Facebooks. 

And so here we are. 

So let's start with some definitions. I love definitions. 

Intolerant:

1. not willing to allow or accept something 

2. not willing to allow some people to have equality, freedom, or other social justices

     a. unwilling to grant equal freedom of expression especially in religious matters

     b. unwilling to grant or share social, political, or professional rights :  bigoted

So now that we all know what it really means to be intolerant, let's talk. We'll start with the line that has Christian activists and the GOP jumping up and down and saying "See?? See?? We're being discriminated against! The Gays are intolerant towards us and spreading hate!" or line 2a. But here's the real clincher: the line isn't talking about Christians. Or rather, the line isn't only talking about Christians, because, as hard as this is for many to Christians to grasp, 

Christianity is NOT the only religion practiced. 

Therefore, it is not only the beliefs and freedom of expression of Christians that need to be protected.

There are those who are Buddhist (check out this story for a great example of religious intolerance), Muslim, Jewish, Hindu, Polytheistic, Wiccan, Atheistic, Agnostic, Satanists, and people whom's only belief system is that we should all strive to be good people…and guess what? Thanks to this little nifty Amendment to our Constitution right here, they are all considered equal in the eyes of the law: 

"Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof…" 

This pesky little Amendment right here, which people love to throw around incorrectly when it fits their purpose (e.g. Duck Dynasty guy, Hobby Lobby refusing to fund insurance that covers birth control, preaching Christian teachings in public schools (or not teaching evolution), making "So help me God" optional in an oath, etc.) is what has Oklahoma all hot and bothered right now with their Satanic statue situation - legally, they have no groundings to say no. Why? 

Because the 1st Amendment protects your right to be of whatever religious denomination that you wish to be. It's protects your right to build places of worship and practice your religion freely as long as you are not harming others. It does not grant one religion the right to dictate the laws and moral standings of an entire nation. 

"But the Duck Dynasty guy! The gays were definitely intolerant in that one. He has freedom of speech and he can say whatever he wants and having him suspended just 'cuz he says gays are going to hell like the Bible says is just being intolerant and violating his rights. He was discriminated against!" 

Ah. Unfortunately, this is wrong again my dear compadre. The United States Government did not suspend What's-His-Duck for his comments. Neither did the LGBT community. A&E - his parent company - suspended him because they have a policy of diversity and nondiscrimination which he violated. When you violate a policy of your parent company in a very public and vocal way, you are likely to be suspended because of it. It's a business decision. Similarly, returning him to the show was a business decision because, simply put, as much as I don't understand why (because talk about staged and boring) that show makes A&E a crap ton of money. Business are usually in the business of making money. This was not an example of a violation of freedoms or of intolerance towards Christians. This was an example of Foot-In-Mouth and suffer the consequences. (Plus do you really want to defend him? I mean really? Because he's also racist and a sexist - but you know racist/sexist in the name of God.)

But none the less, the accusation that a stream of intolerance has spewing out of the LGBT community is becoming some what of a battle cry for the GOP and religious right-wingers as of late. So what's the deal? Is the LGBT community becoming intolerant towards Christians, and in their battle for their own civil liberties, stomping on those of the religious?  Let's look at the kinds of intolerant things that the LGBT community is currently fighting for. 

1. ENDA - The Employment Non-Discrimination Act - ENDA is an act which would work alongside the Civil Rights Act to outlaw workplace discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity. Race, skin color, religion, sex, and national origin are already protected statuses under the CRA. ENDA would mean that a company can not refuse to hire, refuse to promote, fire, or harass an employee purely because they weren't straight or sisgender. And yes, there is an exemption for religious institutes (and 'narrowing it' does not mean that Focus on the Family will be forced to hire an all gay staff…it means that organizations like religious hospital or social service agencies should not be allowed to pick and choose which of their staff they'll allow to be gay or not). Is it intolerant to not want to have to fear for your job or your ability to provide for your family simply because you don't have the protections offered to the rest of the nation's population? No. 
2. Hate Crimes & less tolerance of physical violence - The reality of the situation is there are still many places in this country where people are targeted for physical abuse just because they 'look gay', are transgender, or are not presenting with the gender characteristics that someone thinks they should be presenting with. Only 17 of 50 states have hate crime laws on the books that include the distinctions of both sexual orientation and gender identity. Is it intolerant to want to live in a world where you can walk down the street holding the hand of your significant other or to be able to present outwardly the gender that you feel internally WITHOUT having to fear physical or emotional abuse? No. 
3. Marriage Equality - There are 17 states + DC that currently have marriage equality, 2 states with civil unions, and 4 states that are somewhere in the middle of a weird legal process over the subject matter (e.g. Oklahoma, Utah). There are also a number of states that having pending lawsuits over marriage equality that will come to head somewhere in the near future. The American Family Association has released a list of 10 Arguments  against Same-Sex Marriage which the article linked does a pretty great job of debunking so, in the interest of keeping things short, I let you read them there - especially since they're not anything you haven't heard and rolled your eyes at many times before. I'll address the religious aspect here in a second. As full citizens of our nation, LGBT people deserve the full legal rights, recognition, and protection that having a legally recognized marriage would provide. (If you disagree with any of that or think legal recognition/protections don't matter, watch this and get back to me.) Is it intolerant to want to have the union of yourself and your partner recognized and protected under the law as any other couples would be? No. 
4. Adoption - Hands down the most important thing a child needs is a family that loves and cherishes them, and fosters their growth. Whether that family be a mom/dad, a dad/dad, a mom/mom, a single mom or single dad, grandparents, or any combination of the like…if that child is loved, cherished, accepted, and cared for that is a beautiful thing. The opposition will make accusations to like of: gay men are pedophiles and shouldn't be allowed around children, or  a child just NEEDS a mom and dad. it's proven. it's science. Both of these assertions have been disproven by numerous credible scientific studies by various different universities and scientific institutes. It is also worth noting that the "studies" which made those accusations were, more often than not, done by scientists whom aren't even credited by the disciplines they claim to belong to - e.g. Paul Cameron and everyone who works for the Family Research Institute. Is it intolerant to want lies spread by organizations who aren't even credited by their discipline to prevent you from adopting children into a loving home and growing your family? No. 
5. "That's So Gay"/other derogatory language - If you were at a sporting event, or sitting in a high school classroom, or talking with your friends in a public place…what do you think would happen if you were to scream a racial or sexist slur in an intentionally negative way? If you shaped a commonly used phrase synonymous to stupid, annoying, or unwanted to incorporate a term for a racial group and give it an overtly negative connotation? Would you do it? Would you think twice? What if a person of that race/gender was standing near you? Would you be even more cautious and respectful with your words? As a society we have worked hard to strike that kind of language from our every day speech. It's not ok, and it's not ok to use slurs against the LGBT community either. Of course, there are the people who still use racial/sexist/religious slurs but just don't do it around those people (still not ok, in case you were wondering)…but here's the deal. You cannot turn to your left and right and determine whether you are standing next to a person who identifies as a member of the LGBT community. You can't know whether the kid who sits behind you in math class, the class that you think is "so gay" and during which you repeatedly call the kid that annoys you a "f**got", is hearing and taking to heart every word you say in a way that makes him or her feel worthless. Is is intolerant to desire that intentionally negative and derogatory language not be normalized as acceptable in our societies vernacular? No. 
6. Principle 6/Athlete Ally/Out Sports/etc (and Scouts for Equality) -  "Sport does not discriminate on the grounds of race, religion, politics, gender or otherwise." Principle 6 is the Olympic principle that states that sport is non-discriminatory as a rule. Given the current situation in Russia, where the Sochi Olympics will be hosted in a few weeks time, many activists have been promoting the wearing of principle 6 as a way of getting around Russia's anti-gay propaganda laws. The Athlete Ally/Out Sports/You Can Play movements are all variations on the same theme of working to make the world of sports a more inclusive environment so that LGBT youth and adults don't feel like they have to lie about an essential part of themselves in order to play the sport they love (or be an Eagle Scout and/or future leader for that matter). Is is intolerant to want to spread a message of inclusion and solidarity during the worlds biggest sporting event, or to want to foster a safe and welcoming environment within the realm of sports within our own nation? No. 

So tell me, what exactly is it about these gays that makes them so darn intolerant? 

Is is their unwavering passion in their fight for full equality and protections under the law? The love they have for their partners and families? The widespread and quickly growing support across the nation? It's the rainbows and glitter isn't it? 

Or is it that a huge, diverse community of different races, ethnic groups, religious orientations, sexual orientations, gender identities, occupations, ages, sizes, shapes, colors, etc. doesn't want their civil rights and liberties to be dictated by one religious group's idea of what should legally define marriage? 

That's it isn't it? Hit the nail on the head. Well, I hate to tell you, but not wanting to have your legal rights determined by one set of religious ideas doesn't make you intolerant. However, wanting to restrict someone's civil liberties and protections under the law based on your personal religious beliefs??…well that goes straight back to our handy definition of intolerance: 

2b. unwilling to grant or share social, political, or professional rights :  bigoted

So we'll rap it up with this. Until the leaders of the LGBT community hold summits to discuss how they can be more like nations where Christianity is illegal and/or there is a "Kill-the-Christian's" bill (see here), until the leaders of the LGBT community try to pass laws that will prevent the marriage of Christians, until 12-18 year olds sit in schools and refer to the class they hate the most or that homework assignment as "so Christian" when they mean stupid or annoying, until Christian's deal with the constant fear of beat to death for walking down a normal city street because they "looked at me funny and I thought they were Christians", until leaders of the LGBT community create discredited scientific institutes and try to pass off their studies filled with fabricated data as truth to accuse all Christians of being pedophiles who are trying to recruit children……

until then? calling the LGBT community "more intolerant than the taliban" just makes you look completely ridiculous, petulant, and ignorant.  

But real quick while we're on the Tabliban, let's look at what some of their overly strict interpretations of Islamic law look like…

- they're anti-abortion 

- supportive of the death penalty 

- oppose the separation of church and state 

- believe religious doctrine should be taught in public schools

- think women should/do have fewer rights than men 

- oppose multiculturalism 

- consider homosexuality evil and believe gay marriage should be outlawed. 

Now, that sure doesn't sound like the LGBT community to me. But you know who is does sound like? I'll just leave this here. 

I've Changed.

"You've changed." 


I am part of a generation that had been constantly immersed in Social Media for the majority of the latter half of my life. I got a Xanga when I was 12, a Myspace shortly after, and a Facebook when I was 14. When I see something I agree with, think is cute, hilarious, undyingly romantic, or something that pulls on the heartstrings and accurately portrays how I am feeling, I push the like button. The little innocuous thumbs up in the bottom left hand corner of the a post in your Facebook Newsfeed. 

Around the time that I left for college, Facebook started showing more and more of what people were 'liking' on their newsfeeds. My opinion has always been that if I am ashamed of something that I am doing or something that I believe to the point where I feel I need to hide it from my friends and family, then it's not something I should be doing. So I didn't stop liking thing that I stood for, because I'm not nor have I ever been ashamed to stand up for equal rights and protections for any disadvantaged population of people.

When I was in elementary school, my family used to joke about having accidentally raised a bleeding heart liberal. Slowly and surely they came to realize that it was far more truthful of a statement than it was a joking one. My immediate family embraced me and loved me for standing up for what I believe in and working so passionately towards human rights and equality. The rest of my family has casually looked the other way and tried their hardest not to bring it up at family functions. 

Last night, a member of my extended family took offense as something I shared in a satirical mindset, and posted very derogatory status about how I was a 'complete idiot' and how I didn't have 'simple common sense' for someone who was 'SUPPOSED to be smart.' They asserted that I apparently learned at alma mater that no one ever needed to go to church, when the reality is that my disenchantment and skepticism with organized Christianity started when I was 14 and leading worship at their own local church because of some very specific happenings. They wanted me to know that they were incredibly disappointed in me and the person that I have become, because I've Changed. 




Many of the arguments above I won't even touch. If everyone in my family wants to believe that all state schools are satanic liberal institutions that are intentionally drawing youth away from the church, that's their choice. If they want to believe I'm an idiot who lacks simple common sense, that's also their choice. If they want to call me a sheep and say that I am mindlessly following the masses without any opinion or cognition of my own, that is also their choice. But one thing that I can not allow them to say is that any of my beliefs are 'new' or that I have 'changed." 

Ask me about the first time that I was ever expressed my displeasure at members of my family using racial slurs. 

I was in elementary school. Members of my family used racial slurs for hispanic people and blacks and said that they, "didn't mean it in a bad way, they just grew up with that language." I cried wouldn't talk to them until they promised not to say them anymore. 

Ask me about the first time I wrote a paper for school that made my mom and dad shake their heads and say 'Good Lord, we gave birth to an activist." 

3rd Grade. We were learning how to write persuasive papers. Other people wrote papers on why we should have soda in the lunch room, or why we should get rid of Mondays... I wrote about "The Inhumane Captivation of Animals at the Dallas Zoo." 

Ask me about the next time that happened.... 

A few months later they expanded the highway on the edge of town and I just about went into hysterics over the loss of wildlife habitats. 

Ask me about the first time someone in my family told me that I couldn't have a crush on someone of a different ethnicity, because, "no self respecting white man would ever let his daughter date a n****r." 

I was in elementary school, and she spent the whole rest of the ride to school telling me that I was "young and stupid and didn't know what I was talking about" because I wouldn't agree with her. 

Ask me about the first time I went off on someone for generalizing the hispanic man riding his bike to work as a "G**D**n illegal alien..." 

I was in elementary school, and I told the person that they knew nothing about him, asked them if they knew what assuming does, and then gave them the silent treatment for the next week on our rides to school. 

Ask me about the first time I stood up for my LGBT friends. 

It was the beginning of my sixth grade year and one of my close friends had just come out to me. I told my parents that I thought that gay people should be allowed to love who they wanted because God didn't make mistakes so he must have wanted them that way. 

Ask me about the first time I told my mom I didn't want to go to church. 

7th grade. My father was in prison for drinking and driving and the members of the church didn't know how to act around us, so they repeatedly treated my mom and my family like the red headed step child because of the perceived stigma of him being gone. I told her that I wouldn't go to church with a bunch of hypocrites. 

Ask me about how no matter how many youth groups/church camps I attended or how many worship services I led at however many churches, my opinion never changed because that hypocrisy was present at every single one of them as well. 

And then ask me about how that never changed my unwavering faith in God, because I know that just because we as his followers are human and flawed does not mean that He is.  Even so my perception of the institution of the christian church will forever be marred by these experiences. 

Ask me about the time that I defended a gay couple that was on a sitcom, and asked my friends who said it was "disgusting" just what they planned to do if they were in public with their future children and saw a gay couple holding hands. 

I sat alone at lunch for a week. 

Ask me who I would have voted for in 2008 if I had been 18 (pre-attending the satanic liberal institution which has destroyed my mind and condemned me to hell). 

Obama. 

Ask me about how I "stirred up trouble" at Thanksgiving that year. 

A member of my family proclaimed that Obama was a GD idiot because now he was saying that he was getting his daughters a hypoallergenic dog, and there was no damn thing....to which I replied,  "Yes there is."  and then sat in the living room by myself for the next 30 minutes.

Ask me about having a fight with a member of my family because I was letting my house become the 'local fa***t hangout' and how that was unacceptable. 

I told this person to stop acting like a bigot and think about what they had just said out loud and how they would have felt if any of the people they were talking about had heard them, and then I said that either I was hanging out there with my friends, or somewhere else with my friends, but that they were a part of the deal. All they had to lose was me.

Ask me about what the first thing that one of my family members said to me about Sam was.

"He's a nice boy, but we don't date people like that." to which I replied, "well  we  do." 

Ask me about how my mom had to sit down and talk with my family about how they were treating me and my fiancé because of his ethnicity. 

I'll tell you how great it felt to have her defending us. 

Even so, ask me the last time my family used a racial slur when Sam and I were present to hear it. 

Thanksgiving, 2012. 

Ask me who I voted for in this most recent election (post-having been enrolled and indoctrinated by the satanic liberal institution of my misguided youth). 

Obama. 

Ask me which political party I belong to. 

I don't. I don't believe in the two-party system and I vote for each individual office based on a candidate by candidate basis because political party affiliation does not an upstanding citizen or fantastic leader make. If I haven't had a chance to take the time to research the candidates, I abstain from voting in that section since I cannot make an informed decision. 

Ask me what a Planned Parenthood Clinic is really like. 

I'll tell you about how incredibly important they are to women's health in this nation and how without them I wouldn't have been able to afford yearly well-woman exams or birth control during the time that I was uninsured in college.

Ask me what it feels like to have Medicaid when all of your friends and family members have insurance through their parents jobs and get medical treatment with the doctors you know and love....

...while you have to take entire days off of school to drive to the far side of the metroplex to the sketchy, backdoor clinics that would take your insurance and usually give you a wrong diagnosis as well.  Ask me what it feels like to age out of Medicaid and the University Health Care System and to not be able to afford to go to the Dr when you're sick. 

Ask me about how many times I've been accused by family members of being someone who "just likes to stir up trouble and cause drama" because I can't stand to sit quietly when someone is degrading a fellow human being. 

I will proudly say Countless. 

Ask me how many times I got lectured on the car ride to family holidays/functions about how I needed to just keep my mouth shut because, "You know how it'll end up." 

Ask me how many family functions I spent on my phone or outside away from everyone to avoid conversations I couldn't stand to listen to, but wasn't allowed to comment on. 

Ask me how amazing it felt to be fostered and mentored in a program at my university that gave me the knowledge, skills, self and cultural awareness to be able to articulate the things that have bothered me ever since I was a small child. Ask me how utterly amazing it feels to be able to better stand up for the things that I have always believed in. 

I see your "You've Changed" and raise you an "I've found a voice."  

And now for some Jeff Foxworthy.... 

If you think that it's the good Christian thing to do to go on community outreach missions that give food to the homeless or needy families in your communities.....

but you support the defunding of programs like welfare or food stamps on a national level....

You might need a reality check. 

If you think that everyone on welfare is a drug addicted, racial/ethnic minority with 12 kids living in the ghetto and refusing to work....

....and you've never taken the time to research the demographics of the families and individuals who have sought or are currently seeking government assistance of some kind....

You might need a reality check. 

If you think that Obamacare is going to destroy our nation and condemn all of the elderly to death....

....and you've never taken the time to compare our health system to that of every other major 1st world country (who all have a government subsidized health care system like Obamacare) and seen how poorly we currently compare....

You might need a reality check. 

If you think this current government shut down is just about Obama/the democrats being stubborn on welfare/obamacare....

....and you haven't taken the time to read the lists of demands the GOP presented for their 'compromise' ....

You might need a reality check. 

If you think that laws or economic policy that benefits the upper 2 percent of the population are ever laws that would also benefit the everyday man.....

You might need a reality check. 

Congress right now: Watch from 4:00-4:10minutes.
Stuart is the GOP, Mama is Obama.  

Excuse me, It's late. I think I'll go to sheep now. Baaaaah. 

...and what else does Leviticus Say?

And what else does Leviticus say?

Leviticus 18:22 - "You shall not lie with a man as with a woman; it is an abomination." 

I'm going to go out on a limb here, and say that because of the present cultural climate, this just might possibly be the most well known bible verse currently by both Christians and non-Christians alike. It's usually followed by a, "It's as simple as that" or "That seems pretty clear to me."  Even those who  never cracked open a bible outside of their third grade sunday school classrooms can throw that one into a debate quicker than you can spell b-i-g-o-t. But what people don't know or want to talk about (so of course I'm going to talk about it) is all of the other delightful teachings than can be found in the good old book of Leviticus. So here we go - because I'm an all-or-nothing kind of gal. 

Leviticus 11:7-8 - "And the pig, though it has a divided hoof, does not chew the cud; it is unclean for you. 8 You must not eat their meat or touch their carcasses; they are unclean for you."

Translation: Don't eat pig. Don't touch pig. Don't think about pigs. etc.
Problems:

• Bacon
• Bacon 
• Bacon 
• Ham 
• Football 
• Bacon 
• I mean come on, my family eats ham on freakin' Easter. We're for sure going to Hell. 

Leviticus 11:9-12 - "9 Of all the creatures living in the water of the seas and the streams you may eat any that have fins and scales. 10 But all creatures in the seas or streams that do not have fins and scales—whether among all the swarming things or among all the other living creatures in the water—you are to regard as unclean. 11 And since you are to regard them as unclean, you must not eat their meat; you must regard their carcasses as unclean. 12 Anything living in the water that does not have fins and scales is to be regarded as unclean by you."

Translation: Don't eat anything in the water that doesn't have scales or fins.
Problems: 

• Red Lobster. 
• Joe's Crab Shack. 
• Shrimp Cocktails. 
• Crawfish Broils.
• Calamari.
• Octopus tentacle thingies. 
• If we followed this law, the Deadliest Catch would have never existed. And that would be completely tragic. 

Leviticus 11:20-21 - "20 All flying insects that walk on all fours are to be regarded as unclean by you. 21 There are, however, some flying insects that walk on all fours that you may eat: those that have jointed legs for hopping on the ground." 

Translation: Don't eat insects with four legs that can walk and fly....unless they're jointed....?

Problems: 

• This one just confuses the crap out of me. One of the very first defining characteristics of being an INSECT is that it must have 6 legs.......Bible....What you tryna say here? 

Leviticus 11:27 - "27 Of all the animals that walk on all fours, those that walk on their paws are unclean for you; whoever touches their carcasses will be unclean till evening."

Translation: Animals with four paws are unclean, if you touch their carcasses - you are unclean.
Problems:

• If you have ever had to bury your pet (or move roadkill), I highly doubt that that suddenly means that God thinks you're unclean and can't go to church (even if it's just until the "evening".) 

Leviticus 11:29-30 - "29 Of the animals that move along the ground, these are unclean for you: the weasel, the rat, any kind of great lizard, 30 the gecko, the monitor lizard, the wall lizard, the skink and the chameleon."

Translation: Lizards and other things that touch the ground are unclean.
Problems: 

• People definitely own lizards as pets. I mean, I don't see anyone boycotting the Geico commercial and this verse specifically talks about geckos. Clearly, Geico is unclean - why are we not more concerned!? 
• This verse also references their carcasses again - see above point about burying pets. 

Leviticus 12:1-6 - "The Lord said to Moses, 2 “Say to the Israelites: ‘A woman who becomes pregnant and gives birth to a son will be ceremonially unclean for seven days, just as she is unclean during her monthly period. 3 On the eighth day the boy is to be circumcised. 4 Then the woman must wait thirty-three days to be purified from her bleeding. She must not touch anything sacred or go to the sanctuary until the days of her purification are over. 5 If she gives birth to a daughter, for two weeks the woman will be unclean, as during her period. Then she must wait sixty-six days to be purified from her bleeding."

Translation: A woman who has just given birth is impure and not allowed in the church or at any religious ceremonies. If she had a boy, it's 33 days. If she had a girl, it's 66 days.
Problems:

• No one is standing outside of churches telling women who have just had kids that they need to get their unclean selves out of the holy sanctuary/temple/etc. They just aren't. 
• On a side note, this verse also mentions that it's not enough to get your period (which is supposedly what always happens at 33 days - because we know that all women's bodies are on the exact same timer) but you also have to bring a LAMB to the priest for sacrifice. You know, to apologize to God for bearing one of his children and being unclean for ____ period of time. Yes, I am aware that Jesus wiped away animal sacrifices by making the ultimate sacrifice himself - but that's almost even worse in this context when you think about it. It's kind of like saying that Jesus had to die so mothers of newborns were clean enough to go to places of religious significance. What? 

Leviticus 13 - It's the entire chapter - so I'm not going to post it here. Just google it :)

Translation: If you get a skin rash of any kind, you have to take it to your priest and let them examine it and henceforth declare you unclean. You are unclean until it goes away and you are reexamined by the priest, or you develop leprosy.
Problems: 

• no church for you zitty teenagers 
• or you little kid who accidentally rolled in poison ivy 
• OR YOU person with chronic eczema
• We go to our Drs - not priests - for our concerning skin rashes for good reason. 

Leviticus 15:16-18 - "16 When a man has an emission of semen, he must bathe his whole body with water, and he will be unclean till evening. 17 Any clothing or leather that has semen on it must be washed with water, and it will be unclean till evening. 18 When a man has sexual relations with a woman and there is an emission of semen, both of them must bathe with water, and they will be unclean till evening."

Translation: If a man ejaculates (be it during sex, masturbation, or sweet dreams) he is unclean. Everything/everyone he touches is unclean until evening and he needs to go take a bath.
Problems:

• If you masturbate (or have dream gratification), you are unclean and shouldn't go to church. Jesus would rather you go shower than come to church today. And you and your wife totally have to wait until after the Sunday service to consummate your love for one another - because otherwise no church for you. 

Leviticus 15:19-28 - Toooooo loonnngggggggg

Translation: There are a lot of verses here, but basically, women are unclean on their periods and for seven days after their periods and then again with the sacrificing pigeons to apologize to God for having the normal body function he gave you when he created you. Also, everything/everyone you touch during this time is unclean.
Problems: 

• I don't see people doing period checks at the doors to sanctuaries. Sketch. 
• There are definitely people who touch/share beds with/even have sex with women on their periods. I highly doubt that anyone expects them to refrain from going to church because of it. 

Leviticus 16:29-31 - “This is to be a lasting ordinance for you: On the tenth day of the seventh month you must deny yourselves[c] and not do any work—whether native-born or a foreigner residing among you— 30 because on this day atonement will be made for you, to cleanse you. Then, before the Lord, you will be clean from all your sins. 31 It is a day of sabbath rest, and you must deny yourselves; it is a lasting ordinance."

Translation: You must ALWAYS observe Yom Kippur.
Problems:

• That's a Jewish holiday, Christians don't even do this. 
• Jews don't believe in Jesus, and he is the only way to God. 
• If A + B = C.....we're all going to Hell. 

(We're going to skip Chapter 18 right now for an important reason) 


Leviticus 19:9-10 - "When you reap the harvest of your land, you shall not reap to the very edges of your field, or gather the gleanings of your harvest. 10 You shall not strip your vineyard bare, or gather the fallen grapes of your vineyard; you shall leave them for the poor and the alien"

Translation: Don't keep everything you earn for yourself. Share with those less fortunate than yourself and don't be greedy.

Problems:

• This one would be fantastic if we actually followed it. I mean, not reaping everything you sow so that you don't become greedy AND being willing to give a small part of what you earned to the poor and less fortunate (and EVEN the foreigner!?). 
• Hey God, the GOP has a bone to pick with you. You're undermining their whole platform here.

Leviticus 19:16 - "Do not go about spreading slander among your people. Do not do anything that endangers your neighbor’s life. I am the Lord. "

Translation: Basically, this verse and verses 11-15 are just saying to be a decent human being. 

Problems: 

• Slander: (def) n. oral defamation, in which someone tells one or more persons an untruth about another which untruth will harm the reputation of the person defamed
• TONS of prominent Christian groups have been doing nothing BUT slandering the reputation of the homosexual community since the 70s (and before). They've gone so far as to create their own 'research institutes' (Family Research Institute - amongst others) through which they publish 'scientific studies' that say that:
•  gay men are pedophiles...in fact, pedophilia is ,AND I QUOTE, "a homosexual problem"
• that homosexual assault is a very serious problem in today's military 
• that lesbian and gay relationships are notably more violent 
• that lesbians and gays have a long term goal of gaining access to more children 
• that homosexuals want to "abolish all age of consent laws and and to eventually recognize pedophiles as the 'prophets' of a new sexual order" 
• that if gays and lesbians had children, they would abandon them during their 'sex parties' 
• that homosexuals are 3 times more likely to make obscene phone calls
• that homosexuals are a third more apt to report a traffic ticket or accident (watch out for those rainbow bumper stickers boys and girls) 
• These studies are printed in their own, self-published journals because the 'scientists' behind them have been discredited by their perspective disciplines (such as the ASA and APA) and the 'sources' they cite have unsurprisingly similar credentials. 
• MORAL OF THE STORY: .....if that's not slander, then I honestly couldn't think of a better example. 

Leviticus 19:19 -  "Keep my decrees. Do not mate different kinds of animals. Do not plant your field with two kinds of seed. Do not wear clothing woven of two kinds of material." 

Translation: Not Needed.

Problems:

• This pretty little verse right here was one of the main ones used to oppose INTERRACIAL MARRIAGE back in the day. 
• People wear blended clothes all the time. I mean, literally daily. 
• Gross germination of flowers, grapes, etc. 
• Herb Gardens, vegetable gardens, flower gardens.... 
• Zonkeys, Labradoodles, Chiweenies, Ligers, etc. 

Leviticus 19:27-28 - "27 Do not cut the hair at the sides of your head or clip off the edges of your beard. 28 Do not cut your bodies for the dead or put tattoo marks on yourselves. I am the Lord."

Translation: Don't cut your hair, trim your bear, pierce your skin, or get tattoos. 

Problems: 

• Everyone does all of these. PEOPLE GET TATTOOS OF BIBLE VERSES. 
• Even the Christians who are adamantly against tattoos have cut their hair, beard, and usually have pierces ears (let's be honest.) 

Leviticus 19: 26...31 - "Do not practice divination or seek omens....31Do not turn to mediums or seek out spiritists, for you will be defiled by them. I am the Lord your God." 

Translation: Don't do all of that other 'spiritual' stuff that is out there. 

Problems: 

• No one's out there protesting fortune cookies or horoscopes being printed in newspapers. 

Leviticus 19: 33-34 "When a foreigner resides among you in your land, do not mistreat them. 34 The foreigner residing among you must be treated as your native-born. Love them as yourself, for you were foreigners in Egypt. I am the Lord your God."

Translation: Be kind to those who are not native to this land. Treat them as you treat citizens of your land. REMEMBER YOU WERE ONCE FOREIGNERS TOO. 

Problems: 

• If only people could remember this. We treat pretty much every kind of foreigner like crap (yes, this is a generalization) and you constantly see/hear things like "We're in a America! So learn to speak English!" or "Go back to _________" or it's all the "________ fault." 
• This is quite obviously not Egypt, but that doesn't mean that we weren't foreigners to this land once. The majority of Christians were a part of that whole colonization-by-the-white-anglo-saxon thing which lead to the genocide of almost an entire race of people.....the NATIVE Americans. Just saying. 

Leviticus 20: 9-27 - TOOOOOO LOONNGGGGGGG 

Translation: People who should be put to death according to these verses: 

• people who curse their father or mother
• adulterers 
• people who have sex with their step mothers (and the step mother) 
• people who have sex with the son's wife (and the wife) 
• gay men 
• those who practice bestiality 
• spiritual mediums (bye bye Theresa & Jennifer Love Hewitt) 

People who should be banished and/or die childless:

• people who marry their half-sisters
• men and women who have sex whilst she is on her period
• people who have sex with their half sisters 
• people who sleep with their aunts
• people who sleep with their sisters in law 

Problems: We're pretty freakin' picky-choosey about all of these, aren't we? 

Leviticus 21: (the whole chapter again) 

Translation: What a priest must do/cannot do: 

• [normal] priests cannot touch or be in the room with anyone who has died unless they are immediate family. People related to him by marriage do not count as immediate family. 
• Priests cannot cut their hair or beards. 
• He cannot marry a prostitute, divorcee, or widow. His wife MUST be a virgin and she has to be of his people. 
• A HIGH priest cannot cut his hair or trim his beard, but it is imperative that he always be well kept. 
• He cannot enter a room with any dead bodies at all - not even his immediate family. 
• He can't leave the sanctuary. That's where he is supposed to live. 

Problems: 

• Our priests/reverends/pastors/fathers/Brother/other term for leaders of churches/worship definitely  cut their hair. 
• They shave their beards. 
• They perform funerals where dead bodies are present in the room. 
• With the exception of the Catholic faith, in which their holy men live in the Rectory, pretty much everyone else just lives in a house with their wife and kids. 
• Sometimes priests and youth ministers have tattoos and even piercings! GASP! 
• If even our holiest of men are making themselves unclean... the rest of us are definitely doomed. 

Leviticus 22 - This chapter basically just reinforces that if you were deemed UNCLEAN by any of the previous chapters, you better not come to the sanctuary or partake of any holy offerings or you'll be in trouble with the priest and owe more animal sacrifices. 

Leviticus 23:1-2 (and the rest of the chapter) - "The Lord said to Moses, 2 Speak to the Israelites and say to them: ‘These are my appointed festivals, the appointed festivals of the Lord, which you are to proclaim as sacred assemblies.'"

Translation: These are the religious holy days/festivals which we are to regard as sacred and always keep: 

• The Sabbath - Specifically, you must rest. You cannot work on the Sabbath. 
• The Passover and the Festival of Unleavened Bread - starts at twilight on the 14th of January and continues for a week 
• Offering of the First Fruits - present your first grain to the Lord 
• The Festival of Weeks - After a lot of counting, present your grain again to the Lord
• The Festival of Trumpets - On the first of July (or first Sunday), present a grain offering and play trumpets. 
• The Day of Atonement - 10th of July (approximately) Deny yourself and present an offering to the Lord 
• The Festival of Tabernacles 

Problems: 

• Christians don't keep these festivals/holidays. 
• People still work on Sundays. 

Leviticus 24:15-16 - "15 Say to the Israelites: ‘Anyone who curses their God will be held responsible; 16 anyone who blasphemes the name of the Lord is to be put to death. The entire assembly must stone them. Whether foreigner or native-born, when they blaspheme the Name they are to be put to death."

Translation: Those who curse God's name or uses his name in vain is to be stoned to death by the people. 

Problems: 

• We don't stone people to death for saying G**dammit. We just don't. And people aren't passing laws or starting political movements to make this happen. 

Leviticus 24:17- "17Anyone who takes the life of a human being is to be put to death. 18 Anyone who takes the life of someone’s animal must make restitution—life for life. 19 Anyone who injures their neighbor is to be injured in the same manner: 20 fracture for fracture, eye for eye, tooth for tooth. The one who has inflicted the injury must suffer the same injury. 21 Whoever kills an animal must make restitution, but whoever kills a human being is to be put to death. 22 You are to have the same law for the foreigner and the native-born. I am the Lord your God.’”

Translation: You have the right to seek restitution against those who wrong you. Eye for eye, tooth for  tooth, murder by the tribe for murdering someone in the tribe, etc. 

Problems: 

• Christian's most definitely don't practice this anymore. 
• Yes, I do realize that when Jesus came, he turned the other cheek rather than seeking his restitution and therefore he taught us not to seek revenge like this verse says. 
• HOWEVER, if we are going to read everything in Leviticus like it should be taken literally and at face value, i.e. 18:22, then when reading this verse as well, we have to take it at face value. If someone punches you in the eye, you have the religious right to punch them back. 

Leviticus 25:14-53 - Basically the whole chapter again. Google ....GO! :) 

Translation: These verses are basically a guideline for how God's people are supposed to live amongst one another and treat one another. 

• Don't take advantage of each other when buying and selling land. Be fair and honest. 
• Land cannot be sold permanently because it belongs to God. 
• If someone has to sell off their land because they are poor, their relatives have the first rights to come and claim the land. If their relatives can't afford it, then when the person gets enough money to buy it back, they have the rights to it. 
• If you sell your house in the city, you have a year to change your mind and reclaim it.
• If any of your fellow men become POOR, you are to help them so that they can continue to live amongst you. It doesn't matter whether they're foreigners, strangers, or other members of God's people. You shouldn't lend them money with interest OR make a profit off of any food you sell them. 
• Don't keep your fellow countrymen as slaves, but rather as indentured servants or house workers. 
• However,  YOU CAN BUY SLAVES from neighboring nations. You can even leave them to your children, because they will be considered property. 

Problems:

• We definitely take advantage of one other when buying and selling things. 
• We don't do take backs on buying and selling property. 
• We definitely don't take care of our poor like these verses say to. And we definitely take preference over whether or not we think someone is worthy of help based on whether they're strangers, foreigners, or friends. 
• Money is pretty much only lent with interest, and food sold for profit. 
• IT IS NOT SOCIALLY OR MORALLY ACCEPTABLE TO BUY AND KEEP SLAVES. According to this, God would be cool with it as long as they are Canadian or Mexican instead of American. Even African works, I guess, if you consider the Earth one big neighborhood. Christians don't practice this (THANK the LORD). 100 years ago, many still believed this. But today, they are at least the minority. 

Leviticus 26:1- "Do not make idols or set up an image or a sacred stone for yourselves, and do not place a carved stone in your land to bow down before it. I am the Lord your God."

Translation: Don't make idols to worship, or images, or carve images into stone, etc. 

Problems: 

• Idol - n. and image or other material representing a deity to which religious worship is addressed 
• Now, I know this is borderline incredibly offensive to some people, but it has always bothered me that we carve out crosses or other religious symbols - yes, Christian symbols - and try to pretend like those aren't idols. Those ARE idols. Christian idols? Yes. But Idols none the less. 
• This goes with even mentioning American Idol, hero worship, celebrity, or the 'American Religion' in which we 'worship' the symbols of our nation like the bald eagle, the flag, the constitution, the pledge, etc. 

Leviticus 26:14-46 - Punishments for Disobedience 

Translation: Some things that will happen to us if we don't follow all of these laws laid forth in Leviticus: 

• famine
• fruitless crops
• wild animals will eat your children and cows and great ghost towns 
• plague 
• you will eat but always be hungry 
• you will eat your children 
• churches will be destroyed and dead bodies will pile up
• cities will lie in ruin 

Problems: 

• While there are some who would argue that this is actually happening, I would argue that it is most certainly not. There is nothing going on in today's world (murder, child abuse, tsunamis/other natural disasters) that haven't been happening since the beginning of the human race. The only difference is we now have the mass media which can spread these stories faster than was ever imagined to be possible in the past. And of course, bad news sells better than good news. 

Okay, so that's the book of Leviticus. 

Now, what I don't want people to get out of this blog is that I think we should just all throw the Bible away as irrelevant and no longer followed. Nor do I think that we should do this with the book of Leviticus itself. What I want for people to realize is that the Bible is the Holy Book we are to live by, yes, but it is also a historical text and that also needs to be taken into account when we read and interpret it's teachings. 

So what was going on during the time in which Leviticus was written? What's the context? 

Leviticus is most often attributed Moses after he led the Jews from Egypt and into the Holy Land, when in reality it is most likely a composite work by as many as 6 different priests. Either way, it takes place when God's chosen people have entered a new land and must try to pretty much develop from scratch a new civilization and way of life for themselves. They are by far a minority and also religious outcasts amongst the other tribes who are residing near by who are not necessarily friendly towards them in the least. They have to try to grow crops and be fruitful in a land that has never been harvested before, which any farmer can tell you is no easy task. And on top of all of this, they have to thrive and perpetuate their race so that God's people will grow in numbers. 

So when we look at Leviticus in that context, it's pretty clear that is is a set of rules, laws, and guidelines sent from God through Moses and His priests with the intent of helping his people survive, thrive, and populate the Holy Land, all while learning how to properly worship Him and give the glory to God. 

Let's look at some of the things forbidden in Leviticus again with this in mind. 

• Pork, Shellfish, Lizards, carcasses, etc. 
• Then: These are all animals and things that are known to carry diseases. Eating them without the proper preparation techniques (which I'm pretty positive couldn't have even been achieved back then) would have almost certainly resulted in serious illness or death. The same with touching but not necessarily eating lizards and other things. There's a reason why there is hand sanitizer everywhere at Zoos and Pet stores. 
• It was important for the health and survival of the people. 
• Now: We know better. We know how to cook things to rid them of any potential diseases or parasites. We know to wash our hands. When Leviticus was written, these rules were very important for the people to follow - but now they aren't necessary and people don't follow them. 

• Women being on their monthly period, having just given birth, or having sex with someone on their period, etc. 
• Then: This was not uncommon for the time, or the times to come over the next couple thousand years. It's not exactly like they had tampons or pads or other forms of sanitary products for women to wear around during their time of the month. Besides the church, women didn't go many different places when on their period - like basically anywhere but home. In medieval times, they were often even sent away until their monthly menstruation was over. Not only that, but blood is also a very big thing discussed in this book. Blood carries diseases and can be unclean, hence all of the advice to not touch or eat dead animals you see on the side of the road. So all blood was feared, animals and menstruation alike. You can somewhat understand where they are coming from. 
• It was thought to important for health reasons. 
• Now: We are not worried about being exposed to women's monthly bleeding for health reasons. And even if we were, we have tampons and pads now that pretty much keep all of that under wraps. We definitely don't expect our women to stay at home when they are on their periods. It's just not followed anymore. 

• Skin rashes or gushing or oozing of any kind. 
• Then: THIS IS OBVIOUSLY A SERIOUS HEALTH ISSUE! If you have an unexplained skin rash or oozing, you have probably contracted something and shouldn't expose other people to it. If you expose other people to it, then they might also fall ill and possibly even die from whatever you have. 
• HEALTH HEALTH HEALTH. How can God's people be expected to survive if they aren't cautious about being exposed to dangerous diseases? 
• Now: We pretty much have infectious skin diseases under control. Even if we don't, and someone contracts one, they will be in the hospital receiving care and the general focus will on keeping it from spreading and getting them healthy again and NOT on the fact that they are unclean to go to church. 

• All of the verses about looking out for the less fortunate, foreigner, poor, etc. 
• Then: Back then, the focus wasn't on you as a person but it was on the community of God's chosen people as a whole. If someone needed something, you gave it to them, because it helped your community. It kept everyone healthy and alive and worshiping God and spreading his word and populating the earth. 
• For the good of the continuation of the people. 
• Now: Well, it would be great if people still thought this way. Sadly though, most generally do not have the mindset, because they don't have to. We are not in a struggle for survival anymore. Christians are the dominant group and in most cases aren't worried about the survival of their people. There isn't the desperate need to focus on the survival of the community (although I know some will argue this) so this along with many other factors has turned the focus to the self. 
• Cutting your hair, trimming your beard, getting pierced, marked, tattooed, etc. 
• Then: There are a couple of things at play here. Number 1) cutting your body or tattooing yourself or getting piercing, etc. was all a pretty big health risk. You could easily contract an infection having an open wound. So, health. But even more than that was Number 2) the marks of the tribe. Contrary to stereotypical belief, you cannot always tell who is Jewish just by looking at them, and more important than anything else during this time was procreating and furthering the race of God's chosen people. So they did things to physically separate themselves from the neighboring tribes so that you COULD tell from looking at them physically if they were a part of the tribe. Like not cut their hair or beards, like not get tattoos or piercings or other markings, and LIKE CIRCUMCISION They were outward signs of the tribe, to essentially ensure purity of the tribe. Gentile converts, while accepted, weren't expected to be circumcised, because after all, they were converts and not original members by birth. Most orthodox Jews still hold this belief today. 
• To mark themselves with outwards signs so that they would be recognized as God's people and would be considered physically separate from the 'pagan tribes' which they were surrounded by. 
• Now: In general, you cannot outwardly identify people based on hair cuts, beard trimming, tattoos, piercings, or even circumcision. All of these things have lost their major religious significance and instead are aspects of our general culture. 

Using our historical perspective, it's pretty easy to understand why a lot of things are prevalently practiced in modern day Christianity, but what about Sexuality? How does the historical context play into sexuality in Leviticus, and more specifically, Chapter 18? 

Ok, here we go. 

Sexual Relationships that are forbidden, according to Leviticus: 

• No relatives - including: 
• mother
• step mother
• half sister, real sister, step sister, or sister-in-law
• grand children 
• aunts
• daughter in law
• a woman and her kids (or her kid's kids) 
• a woman on her period
• your neighbors wife
• other men
• animals
• Additionally, you shouldn't: 
• Masturbate
• Pull Out 
• Have sexual relations in any way other than vaginally. 

Okay, so let's look at this historically now. 

First, we'll take on sexual relations with relatives. There are any number of approaches you can take for describing why this would have been considered wrong in the eyes of God. 

• One - During biblical times, when you took a wife she was considered yours - she was your property. So having sex with someone else's wife (a relative's or a neighbor's, but especially one of your relative's wives), would have been seen as extremely dishonorable because she didn't belong to you. And while married men were free to sow their wild oats wherever they please (as long as it wan't with one of the above listed) married women were expected to be faithful to their husband. 
• Two - Incestuous relationships do not produce healthy children. There isn't a big enough gene pool, you need the variety in the chromosomes. Since ALL SEX during this time period was supposed to be for procreation purposes only, it wouldn't make sense to be having sex with people with whom you couldn't procreate viable, healthy babies. Additionally, having sex with in -laws and other people that you aren't technically blood related to would only serve to further convolute blood lines and make it much more difficult for future generations to avoid said incestuous relationships. 
• Three - It is also interesting, I think, to note that Incest is the only almost entirely universal sexual taboo found amongst just about every single tribe, nation, religion, cultural group, or other population in the whole world, Christian and non-Christians alike. Pedophilia is a close second. 

How about having sex with a woman and her offspring and her offspring's offspring? 

• Just like with having sexual relations with relatives who aren't blood relatives, this would serve to lead to other convoluted, incestuous relationships within the tribe. This is not good for procreation purposes, and therefore would not be beneficial for the growth and continuation of God's people. 

Sex with women on their period: 

• See numerous other points about this above. But here I'll also add, you cannot procreate with a woman who is on her period. So this then would be considered sex that wouldn't lead to a potential baby, and therefore not allowed. 

Other men: 

• You cannot create a baby during male on male intercourse, therefore this would have been considered sex without the purpose of procreation, and would have not been allowed. 

Sex with animals: 

• You can't make a baby with an animal. Additionally, we have already read numerous chapters detailing how we shouldn't touch animals at all because they are unclean, so it's is certainly reasonable to assume that having sex with them would be considered unclean as well. They also aren't even the same species as you so there are quite a few things that are pointless with this one. 

Masturbating, Pulling-Out, Contraception, and any other time semen is ejaculated other than unprotected, vaginal sex: 

• None of these can make a baby, and as we have pretty thoroughly covered above, perpetuating and expanding God's chosen people was of the utmost important during this time. 

Like with the other laws and rules in Leviticus, is it much easier to understand why they were once in place and so prevalently followed when we examine them with a historical perspective. It makes sense that certain sexual practices were banned to ensure the purity and perpetuation of the Jewish people. But people just don't follow these anymore. With the exception of the incest laws, which as I pointed out, are grounded in things besides just religion, the majority of those sexual restrictions listed above might be frowned upon today but they definitely aren't considered to be sins worthy of death. 

People have sex with their 'neighbors' wives. 

People have sex with women on their periods. 

People have sex outside of marriage or before marriage. 

People get divorced and remarry women who aren't virgins. 

Men have sex with men. 

Women have sex with women. 

And people most certainly masturbate, pull-out, use contraception, and have sex in ways other than vaginally. In fact, if I remember correctly, the Bible says that someone who is guilty of one sin is therefore guilty of them all (James 2:10). 

So basically, if you have ever masturbated; had premarital sex; had extramarital sex (but only if you're a woman); used a condom, the pill, Mirena, or other contraceptive device; if you have ever had anal sex, oral sex, or gotten a hand job, then you are exactly the same kind of sinner as someone who has had gay or lesbian sex. Congrats, and welcome to the club. 

I guess what I'm trying to say is that Leviticus is a book of the Bible and an important part of God's teachings, but it is ALSO a historical text, written by men, that should be read and interpreted using the context in which is what written. You can't fully value one verse and use its word for word direct translation to mean one thing, and the say the verses following or preceding it are meant to be taken as metaphors or that outdated and therefore no longer important. It's a book - an entity as a whole. Pick one. 

If you choose to use Leviticus 18:22 in an argument with me about gay marriage, then I expect to see your long hair, untrimmed beard, clothing made from unblended materials, observation of all of the sacred religious festivals, refusal to eat pork, shellfish, octopus, insects, etc., and strict adherence to all other laws laid out in this book. 

If that's not you, then I ask you take a step back and realize how hypocritical you sound when you try to use Leviticus against gay couples when you have pierced ears, tattoos, eat ham or bacon, work a shift at the store on sunday, don't practice yom kippur, wear polyester blend shirts, use a condom (even if it's with your wife or husband), masturbate, treat foreigners like they are lesser than your people, cheat on your spouse, marry a woman who isn't a virgin, eat at Joe's Crab Shack, gossip or spread slander against someone, practice oral sex, anal sex, or get/give a hand-job, are uncircumcised, cut your hair, trim your beard, watch Long Island Medium on TLC, play with a gecko in your yard, etc. etc. etc. 

You are a sinner just as you say that homosexuals are sinners, but no one is working tirelessly to ensure that you won't be able to marry the love of your life (or, hell the man/woman you met last night in Vegas). No one is using those sins to try to deny you the rights granted to you by our Constitution. And no one yells at you on the street for being an 'abomination' or continually tells you that you are unwelcome in the church because you are certainly going to Hell. The double standard is absolutely nauseating, really. 

So, if you've made it all the way to the bottom of this post - Kudos! It was the doozy. To sum it all up, I guess my main point is that as Christians we have the responsibility to read the Bible and interpret in ways that are meaningful and logical, and don't just serve to further perpetuate hatred behind the mask of "tough love." 

Love you guys, 

Ellen 

OTHER QUICK POINTS: 

• MARRIAGE is a union of two people by the government 
• HOLY MATRIMONY is the religious union of a man and woman before God 
• If marriage was a strictly religious institution, then atheists, muslims, non-religious, pagan, people away from the church, etc. should not be allowed to get married either. And shouldn't weddings always then be performed in a church by a minister only? Hm..... 
• Sodom & Gomorrah is NOT about homosexuality - don't even get me started 
• The Bible does not define marriage as union between one man and one woman....the bible defines the spousal relationship as any of the following: 
• Eve had sex with one of the sons to populate the Earth 
• Abraham married his sister 
• A man who rapes an unmarried virgin - bonus! she's now half-price 
• A man and a girl whom he kidnapped from a neighboring tribe after murdering her family
• A man and his entire harem (even up to 700! woohoo!) 
• A man and a woman and her sister (as long as the first wife dies first)
• If you want your daughter to have a son and isn't happening, you can pay a slave to impregnate her and then he can take her as his wife!  

 

END SCENE.

“I have said that Texas is a state of mind, but I think it is more than that. It is a mystique closely approximating a religion. And this is true to the extent that people either passionately love Texas or passionately hate it and, as in other religions, few people dare to inspect it for fear of losing their bearings in mystery or paradox. But I think there will be little quarrel with my feeling that Texas is one thing. For all its enormous range of space, climate, and physical appearance, and for all the internal squabbles, contentions, and strivings, Texas has a tight cohesiveness perhaps stronger than any other section of America. Rich, poor, Panhandle, Gulf, city, country, Texas is the obsession, the proper study, and the passionate possession of all Texans.” - John Steinbeck


THINGS I MISS ABOUT TEXAS :(

1. Mexican Food.

Apparently, my entire life, I have been operating under the false assumption that Mexican food is really spicy and flavorful. But APPARENTLY, this is not Mexican Food, but actually TexMex. My whole life is a lie. My favorite genre of food has always masked itself under a different name!

It's not that Mexican Food in Colorado is atrocious or anything. It's fine. But that's it, just...fine. It's like if your taste buds were at a 10 while experiencing the wonder that is TexMex, then they've suddenly been turned down to a 5.5 or a 6. MOST of the flavors are still there, it's just you really have to search for them. It's just bland. And depressing. I think about Campuzano's and Garcia's A LOT. I went through withdrawls last week when it was like all I was craving and I knew it was an impossibility.

Fair Warning: Anyone who hangs out with me while I'm in Texas during March will probably be eating a looootttt of Mexican food. Be ready haha.

2. The People.

If we haven't had a skype date yet, this needs to change. Miss you guys! ♥

3. The Warmth. 

Even though Colorado has been nice enough to have been having "Spring Like Temperatures" according to the news, it's still cold here haha. It's not bad at all. I don't have to wear a jacket every day and when it is really cold it's usually gone after a few days. But still. My Texas friends are floating the river and wearing shorts. I've been wearing a lot of jeans - and you all know how much I absolutely HATE jeans haha.

4. Good Country Music. 

There are two country radio stations in Colorado Springs. One is decent, the other one sucks, but neither is like really good music. But that's probably because I feel in love with Texas Country while living in San Marcos, and am once again no longer in Texas. I'm seriously starting to believe the whole "Texas is its own country" thing. Words that should mean exactly the same thing .....don't haha.

In addition to that, literally about half of the radio stations in Colorado Springs are either Christian rock or preachers/church sermons. WHYYYYY. I mean, Christian rock is cool and all - but only for church camp or youth group. I'm pretty open about liking all different kinds of music, but I cannot stand to listen to Christian rock. Everything is in G. It all sounds the same. Jesus is my boyfriend. And you can tell within like 2-3 bars of the song if you've landed on a Christian rock station. And there are literally preachers or Christian talk shows on multiple stations and not just on Sundays. I love Jesus & all....but please just no haha. Sam and I seem to always be racing to see who can turn the channel faster. They're like radio land mines.

So to sum up the radio experience, they have Kiss FM, The Beat, Country Suck, Country Decent, random other fuzzy hits station, alternative rock, fuzzy oldies, fuzzy hispanic, and tons and tons of Jesus. I need to download more music to my ipod.

5. DANCING

I feel like half of this is Sam's fault. We all know he doesn't like dancing. But it's also a lack of the awesome people who I used to go dancing with. There's one Country/Western dancing place here, but I've heard mixed reviews on its sketchiness. I'm still 100% willing to try it, so here's hoping for a dance night in the near future! ;)

There is also this gay club called Club Q down the road from my house that I am literally dying to go to. I follow them on facebook and they are always posting about Karaoke nights and Drag queen performances. Seriously? I'm missing out on so much fun. All of my club friends are back in Texas though and we all know that its completely annoying for a straight girl to show up to a gay club unattended. By myself I don't have the magical rainbow keys to the kingdom. Bummer. I'll continue to live vicariously through their facebook posts haha.

THINGS I AM LOVING ABOUT COLORADO 

1. Mountains? 

I put a question mark there because I'm not a big mountain person. What? I know. I'm like not human. They're beautiful and all, I've just never been super impressed by them. I think it's because my subconscious equates them to cold and physical activity. HOWEVER, there has been more than one day when I've been driving or standing out side with Indy and just been like, "Geez, it's beautiful here." and it finally hits me that I live in a place that people choose to vacation. The picture above (& the background of this page) is actually the view out of my bedroom window. No joke. It's completely gorgeous. 

2. The People :) 

I'm loving being so much closer to Sam. It's such a drastic change to go from seeing him every 6-7 weeks (if not more) to literally seeing him every 5 days. It's amazing. 

I also love the steady stream of houseguests I've had since I moved up here. Since I have two extra bedrooms, we are constantly encouraging people to get away and come stay for the weekend. I've had a couple of cadets and a slew of girlfriends (thanks to Valentine's Day weekend ;) ) and it's been really fun. 

I've also loved just getting to meet all of Sam's friends that he's always talked about. Having 17 of them over her for the Super Bowl was an experience, but definitely a really fun one. How we fit 17 people in my living room, I'll never know. But we did it, and it was cozy haha. Indy loved it too. He passed out so hard after everyone left that he wasn't even snoring. Dead dog syndrome. Phillip picked one person and slept in his lap the whole time though, so she was happy too I guess haha. 

3. My Workout Class. 

 I started training with Joe Martinez at his Women's Bootcamp Fitness Classes and it's been completely awesome. Gyms/trainers in Colorado are generally really expensive (because everyone wants to be fit so they can jack up the prices), but I am definitely getting a great deal and more than my money's worth with Joe's classes. They're just down the street from my house, so I really have no excuse not to go, and I have three sessions a week. You're in group of other women and it's just a really positive atmosphere. It's literally like having your own person trainer without having to pay trainer prices. My jeans are uncomfortably looser and when I wore my slacks last week for an interview, they were not okay at all and I was just hoping that no one would notice how saggy they were haha. But that's a good thing, so I won't complain. Except that probably means I'll need to buy new clothes soon, and help me I'm poor haha. 

4. Being someplace new. 

I always said that I wanted to go out of state for my undergraduate, but because of the major I chose, money, and the fact that I got a full ride to Texas State that didn't end up happening. Not that attending Texas State is something that I'll ever regret! It has literally been the best, most amazing experience of my life to date. San Marcos will always be one of the places that I call home. ♥  

But finally getting out and just getting to experience another part of the country is an amazing experience. I don't think you can fully understand the world around you if you always stay in the same place. If anything, I'm very grateful that Sam is going to make me a military wife so that we have a valid excuse to travel and experience different places in the world around us. Here's to starting with Colorado :) 

THINGS THAT I'M STILL NOT TO SURE ABOUT

1. This whole winter/snow thing. 

I'm not sure I like having four seasons. I was completely okay with having summer, spring-ish summer, fall-ish summer, and a wild card season. Snow is cold & wet & makes people drive stoopid. There is a small hill by my house and I watched like 10+ cars completely fail at trying to get up said hill yesterday in the snow. Trucks and SUVs were like whatevs, I got this, bye. But the little cars? (and why would own a little car without 4 wheel drive in a place where it snows a lot) They were completely hopeless. 

However, my car drives beautifully in the snow. Considering that I drive on the 'end of maintained snow routes' on base every time I take Sam home on Sunday, that is something that I am ever so grateful for. I'm also grateful that I live one turn off of one of the main roads through town, so it's always plowed, sanded/salted, and well driven on. But mostly, I'm grateful for my car. Thank you little baby jesus for my lovely ice blue Jeep Grand Cherokee with All-Wheel drive and snow tires. And thank you mom for remembering that something like All-Wheel drive with snow tires would be necessary. Let's take a moment to admire it's majesty..... 

My car being new and nice does make me really nervous to drive in the snow up here though. Mostly because I'm terrified someone else is going to lose control because they're driving way too fast and slide across the snow and ice into me. I would be highly upset. 

Also, my car doesn't have a name yet, which is pure tragedy. Feel free to offer suggestions. :) 

Indy loves the snow though, so I guess that's definitely a redeeming quality for it. It can keep him entertained for hours on end...of course that means I have to stand outside in the cold with him which he plays in it. But he's happy, so I bundle and deal haha. 

2. It's not Texas. 

I mean, that one's kind of self-explanatory. Most places don't serve sweet tea, and when you order it they look at you like whhatttt? If they do have sweet tea, it's probably made with artificial sweeteners and not sugar. Boo. Headache waiting to happen. 

No Whataburger. No Mexican Food. No Chicken Express. Excuse me while I curl up and cry. What am I supposed to eat then? At least they have Texas Roadhouse, which people are always really surprised to find we also have back in Texas haha. 

When someone finds out your from Texas, they have one of two reactions: 

- Oh my god! Me too! Let's talk about how awesome Texas is. 

- Oh. I guess we can still be friends. OR! You're from Texas? Why don't you have an accent? 

-____- Rude. Texas = Awesome. See the first interaction haha. I guess Texans have a reputation for thinking Texas is better than everything else. And let me just say that I am completely guilty of this, but I'm nowhere near as bad as some people I know. I think Texas is supremely stupid about a number of things (namely, it's extremely conservative views) and I definitely don't think that it's a perfect utopia.....but I do think its pretty dang close. ;) Let me defend Texans for a second though and try to shed some light on this situation. Like I said earlier, I really do think that Texas is practically it's own country. Texas is incredibly huge and as a result a large number of different subcultures exist within the larger Texan culture as a whole.Things that we take for granted as being completely normal - even differences between us - are not AT ALL the same when you get outside of the state. But it seems that the differences are not so extreme between the other states. We, as Texans, seem to be the odd ones out. And most of us are 100% okay with that, so I don't forsee any changes in the near future. Texas will remain that popular kid that no one really likes. Ride on, Texas. Ride on. 

While I am continually asked why I don't have an accent, I have also been informed that there are particular words/phrases in my vocabulary that are a dead give away. 

1. Ma'am. I caught on to this one while I was still in Texas though. I was brought up that everyone who was preforming a service for you, in a position of authority, or just merely your elder was a sir or ma'am. Call customer service? "Thank you ma'am, have a nice day". At a restaurant, "Can I get you anything else?" - "No ma'am, thank you." At the airport, "Are you checking any other bags?" - "No ma'am, thank you for your help." But the thing is ... PEOPLE DON'T LIKE THIS. Whhhattttt??? I've had people flat out tell me to stop calling them ma'am, and not in a nice way. I get really weird looks when I use it out in public, but the BEST part is getting the question, "Are you MILITARY or are you from TEXAS?" Sam and I get this all the time. To which we proudly answer both. :)
2. The number 10. Which I say ten, and everyone I know says ten, but is apparently supposed to be pronounced 'TEHN'. Teh-nnnn. My whole life is a lie. 
3. Calling Indy 'Sugar' or telling him to 'Cut his sh**' when he's being bad. Okay, yeah. I guess I can see how those are kind of a dead give away haha. 

4. and finally, DEMOGRAPHICS 

Let's start with some basic facts. Demographically speaking, this is what Texas looks like: 

• 70.4% White
• 11.8% Black 
• 37.6 % Hispanic or Latino 

Dallas looks like: 

• 50.7% White
• 25% Black 
• 42.4% Hispanic or Latino 

(It is important to note that these numbers don't add up to 100 because I didn't include the specifics for Asian americans, Pacific Islanders, Native Americans, or people who identify as biracial because I don't need to be super specific to make this point - and also because 'Hispanic/Latino' is an ethnicity and not a race, so people in that category also belong to either White, Black, or another race.) 

Now, here's what Colorado looks like: 

• 88.3% White 
• 4.3 % Black 
• 20.9% Hispanic or Latino 

and Colorado Springs looks like: 

• 78.8% White
• 6.3% Black 
• 16.1% Hispanic or Latino

Those are huge differences. And as someone who moved from one to the other, let me just say that they are very, very apparent. I went from a place where for a while I was the only 'white' roommate (and loving it), and working for the Office of Multicultural Student Affairs on a college campus that fully embraces diversity of all kinds to a place where almost all of my daily interactions are with white people. It's weird. 

I am a firm believer in Gordon Allport's Contact Theory, but after having lived in Colorado for about 2 months I don't know how anyone could ever doubt is validity. Contact theory is essentially the theory that states that interpersonal contact is one of the most effective ways to improve prejudices between majority and minority groups. Here are interactions I've had/things people have said to me since I moved to Colorado. 

• I was explaining to someone that I was disappointed that CSU Pueblo didn't have a masters program that would fit me, because I thought I would really like the atmosphere of the campus. 
• Person: Oh, well that's a good thing. You don't want to go there.
• Me: Why? 
• Person: There are a lot of black people there. 

-______________-

I'm sorry, what? Did you really just say that? 

• "Racism doesn't exist anymore. Minorities are just holding on to the past." ............................................ I just......... I can't......even.....If I were to try to explain all the reasons why this statement is just wrong, it would take like 6 blog posts. Instead, watch this video.

• "I don't understand affirmative action. I mean, that's not equal rights. That's giving them special treatment. I have to work for what I get, why do they just get stuff handed to them?" Alright, ok. I'm big enough to admit that I thought this in high school too, but I'm also proud to say that I've learned better. It ties into so many things, like the historical context mentioned above and a number of other equally important factors. I'm again not going to attempt to explain this in the length of a post (that's already really long), so if you're really industrious and have 7 minutes, watch this awesome video that really hits in on the head: 

OR IF YOU LIKE RAP & MACKLEMORE LIKE I DO ♥ 

• AND FINALLY, the weird, rude looks and just blatant stares that Sam & I get when going about as a couple in Colorado Springs. I'm actually proud of this one. It's that whole contact theory thing.  It's obvious that the fact that we're an interracial couple is outside of the norm for this area of the United States, but I'd like to think that every positive interaction that people who aren't used it have with me and Sam works towards changing their mind. I think it's kind of funny, because I know I'm not the only one who's noticed this because when Sam and I do encounter other interracial couples around town, 99% of the time they will find a reason to strike up a conversation with us. Like we automatically have something in common. That never happened in Texas, but there are a lot more interracial couples in Texas. 

But, if anything, all of these interactions have made me that much more excited about starting in the field of Social Work/Social Justice in the Colorado Springs area. If we only ever talk to people who agree with us, we aren't really getting out message out there and educating others, are we? Let's be clear that I do not, under any circumstances, think that Texas doesn't need help in these areas as well (see above statement about hyper-conservative views being a big flaw) but I do think that Colorado isn't as comfortable as a whole with racial minorities as Texas is.  

So....in conclusion, I miss Texas, but Colorado is definitely growing on me. :) I'm really really excited about actually getting started on this new chapter of my life! 

Love & Miss y'all!